HP: "Tank U for calling HP award-winning customer support" ...
Me: My computer just blew up and won't start now, I need to send it in for repair.
HP: [In my best broken English ...] Can you tell me the problem?
Me: I just did.
HP: What do you see when you turn on the screen?
Me: NOTHING!!
HP: Have you turned off the machine?
Me: I can't -- it won't turn on or off, its toast. Ka-puuut. Done. Zapped. McGONE!!
HP: Can I get you to open the side of the case?
Me: No.
HP: I need you to locate the red wire.
Me: Are you kidding me?
HP: If you're not willing to help then why should I help you?
Me: I'm not a computer repair person.
HP: How do you expect me to help you then?
Me: Send me a box and a packing slip?
HP: I can't until I can justify the need to do that with my manager.
HP: It has to be something we can't fix for you over the phone.
Me: Can I speak to your manager?
HP: There are no managers right now, but you can email them.
Me: I can't email them, my F!#%!#% computer won't start.
HP: I cannot handle abusive language. Call back during normal business hours.
Me: It is normal business hours.
HP: May I put you on hold for a minute?
Me: No.

[Music starts playing]

HP: Okay, I see you are no longer under warranty.
Me: I just bought this heap of crap in February.
HP: What phone number did you register with.
Me: [Gives phone number ...]
HP: Your name is not Matthew.
Me: I'm his son.
HP: We can't talk to you, only the registered user.
Me: You Mother --- !#%!#%!#%!#%!#$!#% Yours in Christ, CLICK.

was this really true i feel your pain. i ahd to phone up soo many times about the internet connection.

It's so damn funny though. I just remembered i also blew up my last computer i chnged the voltage thing i think (sttupid i know) it wouldn't start then bang, smell burnt. Good thing i did though it was 20gb windows 2000 gen(had xp on it though) second hand forom my dad. It hand my 4million pinball high score =O

Gyahahaha !!! :la@ :la@
That operator is insane ! *laugh so hard*
Thank God I have some good PC maintenance skill..
I remembered call some service to repair my PC..
In the end, it was me who do all the work..
He just keep saying, "Uh-huh.. Oh, is that so ? I dunno what is this, plugged or not, doesn't matter.." :X :what

Dude chill out. Getting angry like that won't help. It was best if you didn't swear at the customer support guy because you didn't even know if he was part of the technical support/repair department.

Okay now getting back to you. I'm going to guess that you have an extra computer(well duh, you're on the YL forum right now). Try to do some research if not just try to get help from one of us or a tech forum. It might be that your power supply has just died on you. It also might be some problem with your motherboard. I'm going to say you had this computer for a pretty long time(at least 1-2 years?). I'm no professional but I have worked on assembling a computer from scratch so please use my advice with caution.

It seems as if your computer will no POST or even run BIOS. There are several ways to get it to work and they are fairly simple. You can first try to reset the CMOS jumper. This you have to research on because every board is different. If that doesn't work, take out the all possible energy supplies to the computer. This is best achieved if you able to find the backup battery on the motherboard and take it out. Let the board stand without it for around 20 minutes(or more). That's probably not going to work but I'm just naming some possibilities. You can start off by checking if any components are working. Take the screws out of the chassis and slide one side of the lid off. Make sure your power supply is turned off(switch the O/| switch to off). Discharge yourself. You can do it the ghetto way, which is the way I do it. Put some latex/rubber gloves on. If you have a wrist strap use it. They are cheap probably $5 at Radioshack.

You are now going to perform a bench test on your computer. Start by carefully removing your parts and wires, leaving just the basic components of your computer inorder to run. Last time I checked, I think they are one stick of RAM, CPU, Video card, Power supply, and of course the items not associated with hardware such as a mouse, keyboard, and monitor. Turn on the PC and check if it works. Starting with the least amount of hardware is the best way to narrow down your problem. Sometimes one of the RAM sticks can cause your computer not to work. Or I have been told. If you don't want to do any of the things I suggested which is fine, you can try HP again. No matter how bad their service is, you should acknowledge the fact that each representative is just doing his or her job and don't blame them.

I think amane_kaoru is a computer wiz, so you should probably wait until he sees your post. Take it easy buddy. It's no use swearing and abusing your computer(which I hope that you're not) because that would first off, just cause you to be in a bad mood and hurt others that are around you. Second, I think you might feel better but if you look back at that experience some day, you might just feel plain stupid. So just keep it cool. You'll figure out something. I had a computer issue not too long ago too. It was like these past 2 months. I was assembling my computer from scratch and I forgot to mount some of the standoffs onto the case and guess what? That stupid mistake caused my case to touch the motherboard and that eventually shorted the motherboard. I have to admit, I was angry too. But I knew I would be able to fix it. I paid an extra $25 to get the computer diagnosed. I had to send back my board to eVGA which costed me around $18 to ship. I had to get the same technicians to assemble my computer for a fee of $40. This process lasted until probably 20 days or so before I was able to have finally use my computer. So what I'm trying to get at is, try to stay calm. We are all here to help you.

EDIT: TADA! Happy now town_el? XD

I see your point, but..
Ouch ! JustAnotherYUILover, please separate your post with some 'enter'..
Make a paragraph please...
Just watching it hurt my eyes..

EDIT: YEAH, I'm Happy JustAnotherYUILover..

Ahahha customer service support..yea i hate them a lot!...especially the wait times and how you're not even TALKING to a real human sometimes

there's a website that lists out all the short cut buttons to get to talk to a real human instead of those voiced over option button ones.. (forgot the right term for this...)

yea you can't really blame the service ppl..it's the procedure they were given in order to help. it's really retarded though...blame the information system and the people who created this customer support program...a lot of users get frustrated as they can't get any direct help

Uh.. this is why I use Macs instead. :P

I'm j/k... I hope you get your HP computer fixed, OT.

However, I agree with JustAnotherYUILover. Swearing at the customer service representative will just make the situation worse... I've dealt with real estate agents on the phone who get all cussy at me, and I just hang up on them because I ain't going take their verbal abuse.

And if you called HP during THIS weekend, it is THANKSGIVING weekend in Toronto, so maybe you should call them during the weekday instead.

*HUGS ORANGE TOAST*

im sry i kinda laughed while reading...
(actually just at the "e-mail the managers" part...)
T_T im rly sry

whew...speechless @@

I'll refer to you by your signature gang name, OT. So how's your computer now?